Audrey Hepburn, Michael Jackson and a large cup of mocha...

The world is full of wonder...

I'm fairly sure Saturday mornings are a teacher's reward for an exhausting week. There is simply nothing more wonderful than awaking at 6:05am to the alarm, only to realize I forgot to turn it off the night before, and curling up under the covers to crash for another 3 hours. What could be better than that? Simple and wonderful. And yet, what could make it better? Audrey Hepburn, Michael Jackson and a large cup of mocha (not necessarily in that order).


The day began with a quiet breakfast in a wonderful coffee shop filled with old men just returned from a bike ride, and a middle aged couple, married 17 years now, who still love to sneak off for a quiet bite to eat when the kids aren't looking. One large, perfect mocha, a table for two... wonderful.

Somehow, the mocha led to a small used record store. As a 41 year old, needless to say, Michael Jackson has been an ever-present part of my life (whether I wanted him there or not). However, my fondest memory of Michael involves the love of my life from when I was 14. Her name was Lisa, and she was my wonderful 1 year old sister, who could "shake it" better than anyone I knew to Jackson's "Beat It". Among the thousands of albums in the store, I stumbled across a perfect copy of Thriller. It is the exact topper to the wedding gift I've been preparing for Lisa- whose marriage is set for March 13th. Karma? Luck? Chance? Wonderful.

Rob, mocha, Michael and I arrived home to find Kobie and Hal lounging in the sun. Kobie had picked up a copy of Audrey Hepburn's biography that Rob had left on the kitchen table for Hal (Hepburn is Hal's favorite). She perused the pages of photos and watched as the winkles took over the beautiful face... she noticed the face, however wrinkled, remained beautiful. She wondered aloud, "why is she holding the African baby?" Then she questioned, "What does m-a-l-n-o-u-r-i-s-h-e-d spell?" Together we began to read and discovered (or remembered) the fact that Hepburn spent her later years using her celebrity to bring attention to the work UNICEF was doing. Giving back. Kobie was inspired and awed... wonderful.

And now... now Audrey, Michael, and an empty mocha cup sit on my table... and I... I am sure my world, our world is a wonderful place.

Cloudy Days and Existentialism...

Rogue River was overcast and dark for the first day in many. Kids frowned, grumped and bickered today. They struck out at each other, frustrated by the intangible sense that rainy days always bring... the idea that we are oppressed- the idea that they are not completely free. And yet... in AP Lit. we discussed the idea of existentialism... we exist...but after that, all meanings, feelings, beliefs are only created in our minds- our sense of "real" exists only in our conception of it... therefore, I wondered if these cloudy days were more of an excuse- a reason for grumpy to exist, when we have no other legitimate reason to feel badly. It is interesting how much we thrive on feeling... we struggle with any stasis- even enjoyable emotions... we like change- it makes us believe we are alive and changing or growing. I wonder why we don't actively teach our children, and attempt to push ourselves toward acceptance of what is in front of us- a time and place where we can simply be, instead of fighting to be elsewhere, or be something else. Cloudy days are beautiful- colors exist in them unlike any other days.

Cyndi Lauper and Texting...

Family night- chicken parmesean- freshly puchased Girl Scout cookies- an unplayed game, left-over from Christmas- You Tube searches for long lost 80's music- can't believe I still know every single word to "Time After Time" by Lauper... and in the midst of it all, we break down; we discuss the importance of texting, and rules, and why we haven't allowed the girls to have cell phones thus far... We are accused of being "behind the times" as "99 Luft Balloons" wafts through our ears. We are accused of "not listening" but we do. We listen, and we worry. We want our kids to know how to form face to face relationships- ones that exist within the realm of whole sentence structures and sincere thoughts. Certainly we have never wanted to hurt them, and yet, we do. Parenting isn't just hard- it is sometimes simply impossible to do "right"- and yet, it is the most important and most rewarding thing we do. Maybe, at the end of it all, we simply must love them, and trust them... and be there to pick up the pieces if things fall apart... time after time.

Lessons in truth...

At 9:41 this morning, Halli blurted out "SHIT"... she isn't one to cuss regularly... and mornings here, especially on Saturdays, move slowly. We had stumbled into a moment- a teachable moment, as my education professors called it- where truth was to be recognized as the powerful force it is. I think our world has forgotten the importance of owning up to one's mistakes and poor choices. I believe we unintentionally teach our children to find a "way out" with the least amount of casualties to self or others. However, in the process, it seems truth is often throw by the wayside, and "white lies" take root, and flourish. Hal had simply forgotten a volleyball tournament her team was playing in... she was already 2 hours late, and instantly in a panic. "What do I do? What will I tell them?" I asked her what she would need to hear from a teammate who'd been in the same situation- had Hal made the start time, while someone else accidentally slept in... and she knew her answer. Simply, she needed to be honest. Not blame others- face her coach, her team, and apologize. She needed to accept their anger, blame, frustration, and acknowledge their right to these feelings. She isn't used to letting people down, and this was overwhelming to her... but she did it... she faced the team, the coach, and is playing now... and I think she is a bit more of a grown-up than she was at 9:41.

Beginnings...

Beginnings are always difficult, and yet they hold the power, the anticipation and the joy of what is essential to the concept of hope. Life is filled with beautiful and difficult beginnings~ my life has been no different, and yet, I am often sure that Alice was not alone in falling down the rabbit hole, but instead was surely followed by an unremarkable child named Kelly, who found herself sitting with a Mad Hatter, and sipping from a teacup rarely used. The unique elixir created a vision of something more powerful than the cliche butterfly... something denoting the importance of growth, change, and flight~ a dragonfly. Just as dragonflies have "multifaceted" eyes, I seek discovery of my own vision, and to never allow my sight to stagnate. More importantly, the hind wings of this creature are larger than the forewings; symbolically, the past colors and powers the present, moving me ever forward, and ever toward tomorrows filled with education, laughter, hugs from my children, and most certainly, love.

I have no idea what this blog will hold~ what will be at the bottom of the hole~ what will find its way from my classroom, my conversations, my family or my life onto the pages that follow.. but the journey is what is fascinating... the destination is often irrelevant~